Category: Life

And so we say goodbye

Nov 2, 2016
By franklighting_0lmqvj

I love you, buddy And so we say goodbye to our beloved pet, Nibbler, who\'s gone to a place where I, too, hope one day to go. The toilet. File not found. Have you ever…

I\’m going to remind

Nov 2, 2016
By franklighting_0lmqvj

Why did you bring us here? This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! I\'m just glad my fat, ugly mama isn\'t alive to see this day. I had more, but you…

Tonight\’s the night

Aug 1, 2016
By franklighting_0lmqvj

Rorschach would say you have a hard time relating to others. I like seafood. I\'m really more an apartment person. I\'m generally confused most of the time. I\'m Dexter, and I\'m not sure what I…

With a warning label

May 18, 2016
By franklighting_0lmqvj

Son, as your lawyer, I declare y\'all are in a 12-piece bucket o\' trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin\' up that ol\' mess you caused. You\'re going…

Actually, that\’s still true

Apr 15, 2016
By franklighting_0lmqvj

Really?! The key to victory is discipline, and that means a well made bed. You will practice until you can make your bed in your sleep. Michelle, I don\'t regret this, but I both rue…

Michelle, I don\’t regret

Mar 29, 2016
By franklighting_0lmqvj

Michelle, I don\'t regret this, but I both rue and lament it. All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that\'s why I\'m transferring to business school! This…

Doomsday Devices

Jan 30, 2016
By franklighting_0lmqvj

There\'s one way and only one way to determine if an animal is intelligent. Dissect its brain! Stop it, stop it. It\'s fine. I will \'destroy\' you! Why yes! Thanks for noticing. No, just a…

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